A couple of weeks ago, we purchased a large treadmill.
The model we have has 8 “programs” that adjust the speed and inclince automatically.
I started on program 1.

It starts out pretty easy. 2 miles per hour. No incline.
I think to my self, “Eh, this is easy.”

Then it increases the incline, nothing major, 2 or 3 degrees.
Then it increases the incline and the speed at the same time.
“Tricky. Didn’t know it could do that.”

5 degrees. 2.5 miles per hour. (about the speed of a lion walking)

“This is getting a little harder.” (Did I mention how out-of-shape I was?)

I’m not worried though. Even with the program running, you can adjust the incline and the speed mannually. If it gets too fast or too steep, I can just hit the big button and it’ll slow down.

Whoa.. 3 miles per hour. “This is no longer walking.
Not running– but not walking. I know walking and this…this isn’t walking.
I can do it…”

(Average cruising speed of a hammer-head shark, in case you were wondering.)

“Wow, look at my heart rate. (Did I mention we have one of those wireless pulse thingies?) Sure is getting high.”

It’s going faster. 3.5 miles per hour.
That really isn’t fair.

“I .. wow… I … gosh… I’m losing ground.”

I think… I think… I better… I better turn it down…

I’ve detected a flaw in the plan.
Stupid plan.
I can’t reach the button. It’s going to fast.
Gotta go faster… gotta get to the button…..
too fast…

At this point, I fell off the back of the treadmill.
The magnetic safety key, attached to my shirt, pulled off the treadmill.
The whole thing shut down.

I will never look at a hamster in a wheel the same way again.

I have continued my run as a hamster. I have used the treadmill every 2-3 days. I can now make it through the entire first program without falling off the back or holding on to the side rails. My heart rate is still higher than it should be and I’m way out of breath after a half hour, but I’ve lost 4 pounds and I’m pleased with the progress.